Three Hours and Forty Minutes

Under normal circumstances, three hours and 40 minutes isn't really that long. For example if I were attending a Broadway play or window shopping, the time would have flown by. Even if I were cleaning the house or attending a meeting, it still would have passed fairly quickly. But when you're waiting for someone to come home with a key to the house, three hours and 40 minutes feels like forever.

Let me just preface this little story with the fact that it was -31 Celsius. Okay, to be fair, the thermometer reading was only -20, but with the windchill factored in, the radio announced the temperature as feeling like -31. Here's what happened:

I arrived home from grocery shopping at 3:10 in the afternoon. Son #1A walked up the driveway at the same time. He helped me unloaded the groceries from the car, and we went to take them into the house. The front door would not open. (It wasn't locked -- I purposely left it unlocked in case someone beat me home.) The trouble with the door was that the latch must have broken on the inside. We could press down on the thumb tab, but it just stayed down all wobbily, and wouldn't depress. I only had a key to the front door, so I asked my son to use his key to unlock the back door for us, to which he replied, "I don't have a key to the back door, only the front door." At this point we realized we were freezing (did I mention it was -31?), and took the groceries back to the car to wait for someone else to come home with a key to the back door. I left a message of our plight with The Mr. at work, asking him to call me on my cell phone.

We decided to drive to Walmart because Son #1A needed to purchase something, and I really needed to go to the bathroom. The latter reason is no doubt associated with the fact that today was the first day of my "Responsible Eating Plan" which included drinking a lot of water. After taking care of our needs at Walmart, we were wandering around trying to pass the time, when we realized that we better hurry and get home in case someone else was there, also locked out without a key. They would be freezing waiting for us to get home. Luckily no one was there when we arrived. I remembered that it was early dismissal day at school, and Daughter #3 was going to a friend's house after school, and I realized she only has a key to the front door anyway. By now it was about 4:00.

I decided to try and call The Mr. again to have him hurry home, but was informed by the operator that my cell phone had run out of minutes. Of course the phone number to purchase more minutes was locked inside the house. I knocked on one neighbor's house to use their phone. Her car is in the driveway -- I know she's home -- I'll wait. I can hear the dog barking -- waiting, waiting. Okay, I'm starting to freeze. I'll go to the neighbor on the other side. She's a day care provider, so I know someone has to be there with all the children. When I explained my situation, they were more than happy to let me use the phone. I still couldn't get Robert to answer is work phone. I tried his cell -- still no answer. I figured he must have gotten my first message and was on his way home. Yay, we wouldn't have to wait much longer.

Another half hour passed. Naturally we were getting a little bored, so we broke open a bag of tortilla chips and salsa. All this time we are sitting in the driveway with the car running, keeping the car's heat somewhere between "DON'T LET THE EGGS AND PRODUCE FREEZE" and "DON'T LET THE EGGS AND FROZEN ITEMS GET TOO WARM".

The chips were pretty tasty, but I remembered I also had some new crackers I wanted to try. They were pretty good, too! But wait a minute. I shouldn't be sitting here wasting time. I should be trying to chip the packed snow off the driveway while I'm waiting. Okay, that lasted about 5 minutes. Even with my hood on, it was still freezing out there! Back to the car.

By now Son #1A had fallen asleep. I was fairly confident it was just because he was tired (or full). But somewhere in the back of my mind I was wondering if it had anything to do with carbon monoxide poisoning. Realizing it was time to pick up Daughter #3, we waited for the next bus to come by making sure The Mr. or Son #1B weren't getting off, before we left. We had 15 minutes before the next bus arrived. (We didn't want anyone to freeze if they arrived home without a key.)

By now it was about 5:30. Daughter #3 was offered some "supper" from the assortment of chips, salsa and crackers. She needed to get to piano lessons, but of course her lesson money and music books were in the house. I dropped her off anyway, and was able to scrounge up just enough cash from my purse to pay the teacher. I sure hope she didn't mind all those coins.

When I arrived back home, there was still no one there. What's taking these guys so long? They're usually home by now. I was beginning to doubt whether or not The Mr. even had any house keys with him, because he took the bus, and his house keys are on the same key ring as his car keys. We broke open a box of Mini Wheats. So much for my "responsible eating". Within the next half hour The Mr. got off the bus, but just as I suspected, he didn't have a key. He climbed in the car with us, and I "served" him supper.

Daughter #3 was picked up from piano lessons, and we all squeezed into the car with the groceries. We were pinning all our hopes on our last option. Please let Son #1B have a key to the back door! We waited and ate, then waited some more, and ate some more watching one bus after another pass by our house without stopping. Knowing that the next bus to come by would be the last possible bus for the evening, we all fixed our gaze on the bus stop across the street from our house. At 6:50 the last bus pulled to a stop. Is he on it? Yes, that's him!! Now, please let him have a key. The Mr. jumped out of the car to meet him at the end of the driveway. We all watched intently. The Mr. raised his hand in a triumphant gesture. Hallelujah! We grabbed the groceries and followed him to the back door. It was so good to be home!

Of course, being that it was almost 7:00, Son #1B was eager to have some supper. We informed him that we'd already eaten.




And may I just say, the Tostitos zesty bean and nacho salsa was delish!