"She Doesn't Look Like an Axe Murderer"

The other day I was cruising the parking lot at Superstore trying to beat the other eight cars to a parking spot. Any parking spot. But apparently none were to be found. At one point I was stopped behind another waiting vehicle when a complete stranger -- a woman of about 60 -- knocked on my window. She didn't look crazy, so I rolled down my window to see what she wanted.

"I've looked everywhere and I can't find my car!", she said suspiciously. I wondered if she thought I had stolen it. There was an awkward pause while I waited for her to explain further. Then she finally added, "It's the coldest day of the year, and I'm freezing."

Catching her drift, I asked, "Oh, would you like to get in my car and I'll drive you around to look for it?"

"Yes, please." She ran around to the passenger door and hopped in.

It was at this point I wondered if I had made an unwise decision by allowing myself to be alone with a total stranger. I wondered if she was thinking the same thing.

We slowly drove up and down each aisle of the parking lot looking for her lost car. Nothing. So we circled back and looked again. I suggested she use the key fob to see if she could get her horn to honk so we could find it. Still nothing. Finally after about 10 minutes, I saw a car that fit the description and said, "I'll bet that's it, isn't it?"

"Oh, I could just kiss you!" she said enthusiastically. We both knew that was a bad idea. She quickly introduced herself as "Lorraine", jumped out of the car, thanked me again, and muttered something about her mother being worried.

I soon found a space to park, and went into the store. On my way in, I saw Lorraine getting out of her car, which was now parked right on the front sidewalk. I said "hi, again" to which she replied, "My 87-year-old mother's probably wondered what happened to me. If you see her in there, tell her she can come out now."

I walked into the store and saw an elderly woman and asked, "Are you Lorraine's mom?" She responded in the affirmative. After explaining the situation, she laughed and said, "That's my Lorrainey!"

Somehow I just knew that this wasn't the first time Lorraine had jumped in the car with a total stranger.